Sometimes people hire photographers to photograph them as they’re proposing to their girlfriend. Being a photographer myself, I decided to propose to mine through a photograph. Last night I gave a gift wrapped 20″ x 30″ framed print of this self-portrait to my lovely girlfriend of just over a year-and-a-half now. She didn’t actually say yes to begin with. I don’t think she was able to talk, so she just nodded her head up and down in a “yes” motion. And me – according to her – I was shaking when I got down on my knee with the ring and verbally ask her to marry me. I didn’t realize it, but that makes sense, because I certainly was nervous even though I was 99.9% certain she would say yes.

The whole process of selecting a ring for her, and creating this photo was among the most daunting of things I’ve experienced in life – even though I was totally comfortable with who I was asking. She’s awesome.

The ring selection process was nerve racking, even though Julia had already been out to look at rings with me. I had a good idea what she liked. And the self-portrait – that came pretty easily to me. What did not come easy to me is that sign I’m holding. I wrote “Julia, will you marry me?” eighty-one different times with a big fat Sharpie paint pen before getting one I was happy with. I owe a big thank you to my very talented friend,  Bryan Voliton, who pushed me to actually write out the sign rather than generate it in Photoshop as I had originally planed due to thinking there was no way I could ever do it by hand and make it neat enough. He ensured me that a marriage proposal spelled out in anything but my own hand written lettering would be – wrong. He was right.

That’s not all he was right about, either. When I first told him of my plans to propose to her he was so happy for me, and as usual,  gave me some very profound insight: He told me that when you get married it’s like building a house that you will never finish. You’re constantly having to work on it to maintain and add onto it. Meanwhile, in today’s world, there will always be an outside force trying to tear it down. All you can to do is keep on swinging your hammer and hope that she’ll stay right by your side swinging her hammer too.

So, any prayers and well wishes you’re willing to send my way in regards to being the best son-in-law, brother-in-law, and husband I can be by steadily swinging that hammer in the coming years to better both her and my life would be appreciated.

I created this this self-portrait to to hang in our future home to hopefully remind her of one of her happiest moments in life, and to remind me of the huge commitment – the responsibility – that I ask for. I’m super excited, at ease, and scared about it – all at the same time. Is that normal?

She nor I have ever been married or even engaged before, so please be happy for us and wish us the best in both.